the beat takes you over & spins you round
our hearts steady beating, the sweat turns to cold
we’re slaves to the dj & out of control
how much do i love she wants revenge right now? how much?!?!?! i don’t even fucking know!!! all i know is i danced my ass off and my heart is still beating mad crazy, and i love the even more than i did before — if that’s even possible!
and they played shit that i fucking love. they did it up with red flags & long nights. rocked it out with these things. and oh…my…god…how much do i love out of control!? how much?! enough to twerk through the whole thing! oooh oooh oooh and they played spend the night! rock on for the EP tracks. rock the fuck on!
i was well boozed up and so stoked i was fuckin’ out of control myself! of course, the evening did not have the most auspicious of starts, that’s for damned sure…
for one thing, the people that were initially to accompany me to the concert bailed. which kind of sucked. scooter for her anti-VD party & the boy cuz his eyeball was busy exploding (which is understandable). luckily mo came through and joined me for bitchez & booze. ooh, and i met her sister. rock on.
however, whilst waiting for a bus to cart my gussied up ass over to central the most fucked upedly strange thing happened. i’m at the bus stop adjusting the laces on my boots when all of a sudden an SUV pulls up and the window rolls down. and here i am thinking it’s some motherfucker going to ask me for directions because that’s what everyfuckingbody up in this piece does…for reasons unfathomable. i mean, seriously people, DO I FUCKING LOOK LIKE I HAVE A FUCKING CLUE WHERE THE FUCK I’M GOING?!?!
::ahem::
anyways, dude in SUV: hey there
me: [grunt]
dude: where you going?
me: out
dude: you know, it’s valentine’s day and a lady like you shouldn’t be out alone. hope in, i’ll take you wherever you’re going.
me: [seriously skeeved & clutching my cellphone] no thank you.
dude: come on, where are you going?
me: out
dude: i’ll take you anywhere
me: no. thank. you.
dude: wherever you wanna go, i’ll take you.
me: my bus is on the way
dude: what’s the worst that could happen?
me: that’s what i’m thinking about! thank you, but no thank you. [glare]
what.the.fuck?
and then this motherfucker has to stay pulled over with the window rolled down fucking watching me tie up my laces for like five minutes until traffic dictates he move his stupid ass. what.the.fuck?!?!?!
flash forward to the midst of a fucking rocktacular SWR set, they’re about 3 songs from the end and i’m lovin’ it. i’m rockin’ out, i’ve worked up a danciful sweat, i’m stoked i can dance in my spiffy new dress without restriction, my hair has gone crazy, everything is thrumming with music and i’m fuckin’ stoked, man. suddenly my space of twerkage has diminished. random dude #2 is encroaching upon me. like, seriously. my glee-infused dancery is cut down considerably by all of a sudden having some random fool all up on me. like, fucking all up on me! i try to scootch over without totally plowing into the relatively nice girl next to me. no dice. music is still taking me over, still rockin’ so hard that i try to ignore it…and keep on keep on keep on dancing. random dude #2 starts mumbling/shouting stuff at me over the clashing din of kick ass tunes. wtf? i just occasionally smile/glare and nod and keep rocking out, hoping that if i ignore it he’ll go away.
stray hand just too close to my ass for comfort.
unfortunate-sounding mumbles.
occasional grasping for my hands.
dance interferrence.
since when is this kind of shit fucking acceptable behavior?! i mean, fucking seriously!!! what the fuck gives these motherfuckers the right to fucking get all up in my piece and bug me when i’m trying to rock out? huh?! and who in god’s name goes to a motherfucking concert and tries to talk?! what’s the point of spitting game next to a loud ass amplifier where no one is going to hear a damn thing whether they want to or not!? (and definitely not!)
seriously, as soon as the last song wrapped up i fucking bolted out of the crowd and made a bee-line exit to the bathroom. i’m sorry, i cannot abide by sketchy dudes. and honestly, this sort of thing does NOT happen to me. like, virtually never! i don’t know what the fuck was up.
maybe it was the whole VD issue, and every random dude out there is a stupid motherfucker on the prowl. in which case, that’s no concern of mine and fuck the fuck off already. mo mentioned that’s possibly likely. but i mean, what? just cuz of some commercialized bullshit “holiday” dudes have the right to invade personal space, unfortunately grope and all around make girls uncomfortable with their uber-sketchy presences?
fuck that.
furthermore, what the FUCK is it that makes people think they can step to me?!!??! (and yes, i was asked for directions tonight) is it the “girl all alone” thing? like, hunter mentality where predators seek out the solitary prey rather than attack the whole herd? is it the VD thing (which is lame)? is it the whole ‘oh look, unattractive girl by herself, must have low standards, must attack!’ thing? i mean. what.the.fuck!?
i just…i don’t get it. and no sir, i don’t like it.
because it is not flattering. in the least. there’s something disconcerting about only being able to attract the eye of complete fucking crazy motherfuckers, losers, psychotics and freak. like…woo me. only…not.
furthermore, STOP TRYING TO HARSH MY MUSIC BUZZ! i go to concerts for one reason and one reason only. i fucking love the music. i adore it. i live for it. it fucking lights me up like the god damned vegas strip, ya heard? it’s like, what i do. how i love things. i surround myself in it, drown in it, curl up in it & fucking bask. i god damned luxuriate in the shit i love. and, mad props to mo. cuz she’s not feelin’ the SWR vibe like i am, but she came, she joined in the festivities and we chilled. and motherfuck it was fun. the kind of fun i can still feel beating along my pulse. fuck yeah.
ooh, ooh and the best part! i met adam 12!!!!! w00t!!! i met him, touched him, talked to him! AAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!! of course, i was having mad issues actually working up the cojones to do it, but mo urged me on (and this is the funniest part) so we’re by the merch table and he’s all gettin’ stuff for his family (that was in attendance) and i’m all shy dog and ‘hi, i loved the show. you guys were awesome, thank you so much for everything!’ lame and mumbly and HI I AM A DORK! and all the while mo is telling this random fool in a baseball cap how much i loved the band, and how awesome the show is and all “you rock” while random fool’s ho is laughing her ass off. than random fool goes:
“but i’m not in the band.”
heh.
classic!!!!
let’s just say a few beers gets mo pretty tanked. suh-weet! i laughed so hard, and it totally cleared away the last ickies of stupid gropey dude on the dancefloor. rock.
and i’m pretty sure she amused the fuck out of the random dude with her rockstar assumption.
but most importantly, i fucking love she wants revenge and tonight fucking rocked my fucking socks on.
good night, motherfuckers!
we’ve got nothing to prove
instead of dancing alone
i should be dancing with you
this song is turning me on
the beat is doing me in
or maybe it’s only you
but either way let’s begin
