teh awesome:
1. Get the pan that you used for twinkie casserole and put it on the counter.
2. Whew! that was exhausting. Have a martini.
3. Make graham cracker and/or oreo cookie crust. (3 cups graham cracker crumbs, 5 tbsp melted butter, teaspoon cinnamon if you want, 3 tbsp sugar, I think, the martini is making my head feel silly). Press into bottom of pan.
4. Make chocolate pudding. Please don’t exhaust yourself by making real pudding from scratch. Use the jello kind. Only, not the instant kind or the “imitation chocolate flavor” kind. I mean, we’d like this as trashy as possible, but, you know, like, this is *chocolate*.
5. Taste the pudding a few times to make sure it’s really pudding. The chocolate flavor reminds you that you really like chocolate. Have a chocolate martini.
6. While the pudding is cooling, “spread” peanut butter on the graham cracker crust. This is not actually possible, since the crust is so mushy. Get some peanut butter on a knife and thwack it randomly onto the crust. This works best with “natural” peanut butter. Again, we’d prefer you use imitation peanut butter like Skippy, but it doesn’t thwack very well.
7. Once you have decent peanut butter coverage. Pour on the chocolate pudding. At this point, you should be realizing that your pan is so
big that you probably should have made a double batch of pudding. You can’t go to the store, because you had those martinis. So put it in the fridge and finish it tomorrow.
8. Have another chocolate martini and watch “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy”. Spend some time wondering if you could disguize yourself as a
guy in order to get all that free stuff.
day two:
9. Make more chocolate pudding. After it cools, add it to your pie.
10. Now you need to whip the cream. There is something you can add to whipped cream to make it stay stiff. Now what the hell was it….cream of tartar? Arrowroot powder? You’re hungover, so have a bloody mary (extra spicy) while you figure it out.
11. This is the best part. Be sure to make extra so you can eat it while you watch cartoons. Take equal parts peanut butter and powdered
sugar. Put them in a standing mixer and mix. After you clean up the huge pile of powdered sugar that was hurled across your kitchen when you turned on the mixer, add more powdered sugar slowly to the bowl and mix on low to start. Keep mixing until you have a crumbly peanut butter treat. Sprinkle on top of your peanut butter pie.
12. Let the pie chill at least an hour. Then decide you’ll be damned if you’re waiting a whole hour to eat it. Get a spoon and take the pan in the living room (nobody is home but you after all). Eat half of it while you watch reruns of ER. Tell people you had company and they ate a whole lot of your pie.
dr. box is my hero!
w00t!!!
