it should be pretty damn evident by now that my love for all things seth rogen is overpowering. i love him in the deepest cockles of my wee lil heart, i love him in nearly every thing he’s ever been in (because i can not yet love the things i have not seen, even though i do). so obviously, i am beyond excited for zach and miri make a porno because it combines two of my great loves: seth rogen and kevin smith movies.
it’s like hollywood took pity on me for such disastrous pieces of tripe like juno, the dark knight, catwoman, white chicks and a slew of other utterly fetid, piece of shit films and said: ‘yes, there is a god, and her name is alanis morissette and she wants you to enjoy watching movies again.’
and by god i will!
but…while i’m uber-excited for this film, and have maybe watched the ‘i’m fucking seth rogen‘ video about 18 bajillion times (ok, and maybe, maybe i have it on my ipod…possibly), i don’t get what’s so “offensive” about this poster. it’s pretty god damned dull, actually. what is it about s-e-x (or rather, the implication of) that gets everyone’s figurative (or literal) panties in a bunch?
i mean, come the fuck on, people!
there are far more insinuative ads on television every day. anyone seen the “his&hers” lube ads? what do they think the lube is for, basting a damn turkey (worst.euphemism.ever)? no it’s for fucking and the commercials clearly imply that the people are going to use the special lube expressly for fucking yet no one is up in arms. or maybe they are…but i’m too lazy to find out, cuz i don’t care. so you have that and about 100 viagra ads an hour and the man-turns-into-pig-turns-into-man-to-fuck-you trojan ads and god knows how many sexist beer commercials and this, THIS innocuous little poster for a movie that isn’t even really a porno gets banned in the US?!
jesus.fucking.christ.on.a.crackpipe.
how exactly did this country end up the most puritanical, conservative, fucked-in-the-head-stupid about sexuality? there’s not fucking concern for sexual and reproductive health (nay, safe sex is inappropriate and abstinence is the way! only gay men get AIDS cuz they can haz buttsechs!); there’s a disgraceful disregard for women’s sexual health and sovereignty over their own bodies; there’s an alarmingly blasé in the judicial system regarding sex crimes and assault; there’s prostitution and pornography and a high demand for various kinds of smut, yet it’s looked down upon; i can’t fucking name a politician that hasn’t had some sort of lame ass “sex scandal” and yet…and yet…sex is taboo.
i dread the day when the whole nation is a full-blown idiocracy, where the rarity is a non-pregnant teen and planned parenthood is a thing of the past, gone the way of dinosaurs and sex ed classes. oh wait…what sex ed classes?
fuck.
