my roommate is a crackhead (which is why i’m living with her, and making her my common-law wifey, duh!) but last night i came back from putting laundry in the dryer (no, seriously, i did laundry!) to her laughing hysterically. and singing a revamped version of ernie’s “rubber duckie” song. classic.
after an evening of discussing her Defective Dick-dar and the theory/logistics behind it, i’m really amused to come across this:
STACEY’S ADVICE FOR SMALL-DICK DATING
HEY LAAAAAAAAAAAADIES!! Ever reached down there and then thought “Oh no. Jesus no. No no no.†Don’t worry! When you’re writhing on his mighty thimble imagine the millions of happy Lesbians making do with NO DICK AT ALL everyday. You’ve got at least 3 more inches of dick inside you than they do! Makes it seem like a lot more dick, doesn’t it? My mother told me this when I complained about a previous boyfriend’s dick size: Think of of all the hungry lesbians in China who have no dick at all! Now finish your dick before you leave the table right this minute, young lady.â€
–stacey nightmare
tee hee, it’s so margaret cho-ish. whoever this chick is, cracks me the eff up, every time i use her as a procrastination tool. heh. dick.
