it’s no lie that i’ve fantasized about taking a spiffy real vacation to some exotic locale for a while now, but this…this is just plain horrifying and wrong. so very wrong. why would someone ruin the pleasant sanctity of vacations with spawning?!?!!
motherfucking “birds & bees” package? oh ew. double-ew! i mean, i’ve seen lots of super-gay vacation packages on travel websites — even some vacation packages exclusively for teh gheys — but nothing as ludicrously ridiculously gay as thise.
For about $1,800, couples can book a conception cruise on the “Love Boat.” They are taken to a romantic island on the luxury liner of Singapore sex guru Dr. Wei Siang Yu.
At the Miraval Resort in Tucson, Arizona, sex experts Dr. Lana Holstein and her husband, Dr. David Taylor, help couples with such things as ovulation schedules and achieving intimacy.
i can’t read the words “conception cruise” without shuddering all over, so we’re just gonna gloss over that and the parts about obvulation schedules because it also makes me kind of oogy inside.
and barfy.
and how fucking creepy would it be to be on vacation where you know that everyone else there is trying to screw their way into spawning territory. ew ew ew ew.
ok, i might be a bit biased, but everything and anything having to do with *trying* to get knocked up is just really sickening to me. so much so, that i’m almost tempted to go home and down each & every birth control pill i have at once just to make sure it doesn’t happen. and maybe stand by with a spork.
no babies in 2006, yo.
or ever.
