absolution comes in many forms and i’m still trying to figure them all out. there’s definitely a mix of things going on in my head, and even the fastest of typings doesn’t quite get it all out in one piece.
scattered.
and i haven’t quite worked up the motivation to clump it all into something a bit more malleable. maybe i will…sometime.
deceptively gorgeous weather is throwing me entirely out of whack. it’s so unexpected, so contradictory to the sludgy grossness that is coating all of new england in slippery muck. mucky muck. but still, it’s not too ungodly cold out, it’s actually a bit sunshine-y and lovely outside. you know, despite the muck. i even had a lovely walk from harvard square back to the office in central today. it was nice: music, me, sunshine, peace.
i’m starting to look forward to this year a bit, which is a strange feeling. usually i’m pretty much submerged up to my neck meats in dread and worry. i’m trying to get a handle on that. and by no means is everything in my world hunky dory right now, but i’m trying to focus on the stuff that is ok. the stuff that’s right. that way i’m in a bit of a better frame of mind to handle the stuff that’s not. and there is a lot of it…but…
one step at a time, yo.
that’s all i can do right now. and i’ve just about convinced myself that it’s ok. almost.
i’m getting there.
