exactly one year ago today i was just coming out of surgery at BIDMC, it was one of the greatest days of my life.
why would a day under the knife at a hospital be so great? well, admittedly, going to the hospital and all the prep and waiting and general hospital smells and noises and anesthesia and recovery wasn’t that fantastic. i was pretty achey and out of it all day, but you know what was fantastic? coming out of that surgery knowing that everything went fantastic and there were no complications and from the moment it was completed on forward i would forever be baby free. 100%, fool-proof, completely and totally sterile! no worries, no anxiety, no more birth control pills every day and their wonky ass hormones…ever!
it was a mini dream come true, really. because this is something i have always wanted beyond a shadow of a doubt, and after nearly a year of trying and running around to various doctor appointments and the whole Essure failure debacle…success!
those couple of days at home recovering were no picnic, but after? oh man, after has been so fucking wonderful. there is nothing so empowering and fulfilling as taking 100% control over your life. i am so grateful to my wonderful OB/GYN/surgeon for supporting my decision, not being a biased asshole, and making all my non-spawning dreams come true.
it’s like there’s a party in my pants, and no babies are invited! there’s an age limit, and this meow town is for recreational use only!
the boy says he got me a surprise, to celebrate my anniversary. so, YAY PRESENTS! also YAY! NOT PREGNANT! NEVER PREGNANT!
also, despite what everyone thinks and what a majority of the closed-minded motherfuckers of the world have told me, i have zero regrets! none! nada! zip! zilch! there is nothing in the world i want LESS than to spawn, and now, i don’t have to!
i’m happier now* than i ever have been, plus, when you know for a fact that there is no way in hell you can be infested by fetuses whilst fucking…it is fucking AWESOME.
seriously, True Story.
* EXCEPT FOR: i got cupcakes to celebrate at Sweet, they were asstacular. wtf, sweet, wtf? why you gotta play me like that?
