so kw asked me how many shoes i have, and i’ve not ever really sat down and thought about it exactly…but, uh…it’s a lot. quite a lot, actually. i’ve been on a bit of a shoe spree in the last 3 months and while it’s slowing down (kind of) i did go crazy a bit since i got my new job with only one pair really being a necessity shoe (i.e. my rain boots). oh well! on to the count!
it took some work. and actually, it may not be as bad as i thought. my midget estimates she had something like 300 pairs of shoes a few years ago, and that number has increased since, so really…this is nothing!
we’ll start with boots. 1 & 2 are my chinese laundry turbo boots. they are ultra suede, delicious and over the knee. they’ve been waterproofed/treated and are so so comfy. not the best traction. but i loved the grey pair so much i had to get the black immediately after. i think they retailed at something around $120 and i paid less than $100 combined. i am the master of sale shopping! pair #3 is a faux-suede style similar to the CL boots but with a more rounded toe, which i like. the leg shaft is a bit wide, though, but they’re also over the knee and thus fill in whenever my Turbo’s are not a good match for whatever i’ll be wearing. pair #4 is a really fucking awesome boot from volatile usa, excellent traction & style. THEY ARE PLAID! FTW! and really comfy. there’s a small tear on the non-fabric part of one boot that i need to get repaired, but other than that they’re magnificent. i pretty much love anything plaid. forever. pair #5 is my replacement timberland boots for winter. these were pricey, but again, SALE SHOPPING and i got them 40% off. timberlands are always the shoes i pay the most for, but they last forever and in the snowy weather i put them through the wringer. but they’re warm, dry and uber comfy so i really can’t complain. these are my investment shoes, really. now, i’m not 100% where i got pair #6, i feel like it was via alloy but don’t remember the brand anymore. they’re my knee-high combat stompers. heavy as shit, fully lace-up, fucking bad ass. they’re a bit beat up now, but i still love them. pair #7 is again chinese laundry (dirty laundry), i got these in december to have some low/ankle-boots for when i can’t wear any of my flats due to the cold and don’t feel like being up-to-my-knees in boots. i had a bit of an issue — manufacturing defect, i think — with these, but they’re so adorable i was willing to overlook it. this is my 2nd pair, the first had to be returned/exchanged. it was an ordeal, but god i love these boots. pair #8 i literally just received in the mail last week — for the rainy weather — after being without decent rain boots for nearly a year. utterly ridiculous. i’ve had a bad track record with cheapy — albeit awesomely patterned — rain boots, and finally wanted something of substance and quality. enter the most adorable doc marten rain boots ever. this is my 2nd pair of doc martens (first pair below) and the 2nd pair that i have not even paid anything remotely close to full price for. seriously, these retail at $119.99 or something ridiculous like that. with tax & shipping i paid $34. as in, dollars. how fucking awesome is that?! pair #9 is from either jc penney or maybe dillards? or sears? no, definitely not sears. hell, i think my mom may have bought them for me for christmas, so probably sears. they’re mid-calf and comfy pull on boots (i forget the brand). they feel like suede, but may not be for real? they’re adorable fall or spring (sometimes winter, too) and i’ve had them for years so they’re durable. i love them. and last but not least, pair #10 is from delias from about 5-6 years ago. i had some genuine ankle-high mocassins since i was 14 years old, but they finally disintegrated and i was super upset. then i saw these boots. i coveted, and again saved FOREVER and got them on the end of season sale. they’re super comfy, and look fucking amazing on. knee-high fringed mocassin boots, who would have guessed?
boots total: 10
(what? that’s a nice round number)
ok, so i realize i just spent for-fucking-ever waxing poetic on all the boots i own, but whatever. they’re awesome. now these? these are my fancier/nicer high heeled shoes. i only just barely am able to wobble along in heels in the last couple of years without being in some sort of torturous pain or falling on my ass every five minutes (lies!), so occasionally these do get use! let’s start with 1: i have no idea where i got these but i feel like target, they’re partially suede, grey mary janes with a mid-high heel that are just adorable. plus, i can walk in these very well. bonus! i’ve had them easily 3-4 years, so points for durability. on to 2: oh how fucking adorable are these? the cutest, greenest, most so-so-soft suede steve madden booties. i got them last month via dsw, and they’re actually quite comfortable. of course, right after i got them the weather turned to absolute shit, iv’e been guarding them in my closet for the right moment to trot them out. gotta keep these babies safe from the elements! pair #3 is definitely a target purchase. they’re not the best quality (again, target), and the toe-box is a bit short but they have a decent stacked heel and are adorable. shiny, menswear-ish pumps in grey/silver/black. i just need to break them in a bit more, but that’s sad because i’ve had them for years, longer than pair 1, even. ok, now pair #4, these i got via amazon.com over christmas break. i had literally (LITERALLY?!) been lusting over these ridiculous adorable not rated pumps uncontrollably since august. it was shameful, i watched the price yo-yo from $50-$23 and back again, i stalked them on ebay and endless.com and gotham online…but oh my god, do you see the cute?! the plaid?! the buttons?! the little ankle strap!? my god i love them, and finally after months of waiting…they are mine! pair #5 is from dsw (the brick & mortar version) that i got this past september. they’re rocket dog brand heels that i purchased for gravy’s wedding so that i wouldn’t be tripping over the legs of my suit (i’m a bit short). they are comfy, but needed more breaking in as by the time the ceremony was over i was ready for my flats. but they’re the most adorable black suede (are you noticing a theme here?) and i love them. plus, they look fucking hot on, so who’s complaining? pair 6 came from my chicago trip — and even from macy’s at that — due to a firewall mishap and an impromptu invite to the chicago holiday party. it was an emergency shopping trip with ss, but also a really nice pair kenneth cole pumps for a fraction of the price (i’m thinking around $30-33 for these). and finally, pair #7, again a pair i lusted after for a while. every time we were at famous footwear i’d try them on and stroke them and stare and stare forever. i waited until they were almost completely out of season and bought them on markdown. they are fucking gorgeous, blue suede (and no, i’m not admitting i have a suede addiction!). honestly, every pair of shoes in this group is fucking spectacular, looks amazing on and really i just need more excuses to wear them — in places that won’t wreck them — because they’re so awesome.
fancy heels total: 7
(that’s totally manageable!)
what’s that? MOAR HEELS?! yes, yes they are. ok, these ones are also awesome but maybe not as high-end and a few are straight-up novelty shoes. let’s start with #1, these are motherfucking silver kitten heels from torrid, because i’m always on the prowl for kitten heels and can never seem to find enough that i love. they’re comfy-ish. obviously easy to walk in, but my god that toe is so fucking pointy! i’m not a fan of pointy shoes, they didn’t look that pointy online. oops! but, i still keep them. maybe they’ll be replaced sometime soon. pair #2 are the fucking tits. the highest pair of heels i own (4″, just squeaking by my blue suede steve maddens) from dollhouse. the beadwork is amazing, and you know what? i can walk in these better than i can some of my smaller-heeled shoes! i need somewhere really fantastic to wear these at. also, they were a steal: i had eyed them since they were clocking in at $69.99 and managed to hit the end of season sale and grab them for $21, fuck yes. pair #3 is another target find, they’re wedges, they’re comfy, they’re PLAID! what more do you need? pair #4 i found this summer at famous footwear, replacing a pair of slight-wedge strappy sandals i got from aldo that i wore to tatters. they’re a bit thinner-straps than their predecessors, but despite the heel hight are actually quite comfy. they work well for dress-up or casual occasions, so even better. pair #5 you could say is my first pair of actual heels, from maybe 5 years ago? first pair i could wear all day, walk in, etc. maybe not that long ago, but i’ve had them FOREVER. they’re payless shoes, actually, but aside from suede i totally have a thing for mary janes and these are adorbs. nondescript, can be dressy or casual, and don’t give me blisters at the end of the day. i love them. pair #6 i found on sale at oldnavy. they’re faux-suede and a mix of strappy & peep-toe, but they’re adorable. don’t get to wear them often, but they dress up almost anything. plus, i love the color. ok on to #7; these are more from my desperate searches for kitten-heels. they’re payless as well, but despite the fact they are really adorable peep-toed shoes with the most darling little bow on them. comfy, easy to walk in, i like to think of them as my training heels. i’ve had them easily 4 years. love them. pair #8 is from target. i definitely dig the print, again, kitten heels, but the toe is a bit severely pointed. these are definitely going to get replaced if i can find a rounded-toe equivalent. they’re about 3 years old i think. pair #9 i got this fall at hot topic of all places during our colorado trip for gravy’s wedding, specifically for the zombie crawl after the wedding. i can wear/walk in them, but they need some serious breaking in. of course, that just resulted in authenticating my “zombie march” for the evening. they’re fucking tremendous shoes!
awesome heels total: 9
now this mish-mash of awesome is all my flat shoes. honestly, these get the most wear out of everything (aside from the boots). despite having ALL THE SHOES, these are my go-to pairs. probably because i am a complete failure at being a girl and walking in high heels for any prolonged amount of time (seriously, i suck at it). right off the bat, pair #1 is brand-spanking-new. got them on sale from amazon.com specifically to rock out at LCD soundsystem with these bad boys. they’re TUK brand, tremendously adorable, and seriously comfy. sure, i wanted black & white for the show, but i can see these cuties getting a lot of wear in the future. SO CUTE! pair #2 are a testament to my paul frank love, i got them in 2000 at hootenany in harvard square. they’re the closest thing to chucks i own right now (though, i think these are actually keds) and despite how much i loathe the color pink on most occasions, these skurvy sneakers are some of my absolute faves. i wear them sparingly to make them last, but god, i love these shoes. pair #3 are my gym shoes (utilitarian!), adidas that i trolled online to wait for the markdown, i think they were about $70 to start or maybe $90? i forget where i bought them, some ghetto reseller but i love them. super-duper-lightweight! and adorable. pair 34 are beyond fucking adorable, they’re THE CUTEST EVER. aragorn got them for me at famous footwear. i forget the brand, except that it’s fucking AWESOME. i would wear these every day if i were not afeared of getting them scuffed/dirty/ruining them. but when i do wear them, i look awesome. pair #5 is another chinese laundry pair from famous footwear. they’re about a year old, almost two, but i’ve worn them to hell. they’re not very structured in the way of materials, so they’ve warped in shape considerably. very handy for when i got my 2nd foot tattoo, though. but still, they’re on their way out, unfortunately. worn.to.shit. pair #6 is a $9 backup pair from target (are they slippers? i don’t even know!) for when i wear heels or something that might be uncomfortable for distances, easily folds up into a bag. plus they’re plaid, so cute! pair #7 was like, my proudest pair of shoes forever. found these adorable mary janes at a now-defunct thrift store in harvard square — before everything there became a motherfucking bank — in PRISTINE CONDITION. seriously, no wear on the treads, sparkly clean as if they just came off the assembly line, gorgeous motherfucking doc martens. in a thrift store. in harvard square. i got them for $30, i paid immediately and ran out afraid they’d realize they’re colossal mistake in selling these beauties. this was in 2001. they are still in top condition. i wear them all the time and they look awesome every time. i love you, my babies. love you! lucky #7, i guess! pair #8 is from payless, adorable buffalo plaid flats. i got them as backup to prolong the life of my favorite pair of plaid flats — which, unfortunately they died. as did their identical replacements, fuck. luckily these were about $4 so i won’t feel bad when i wear them to shit. pair #9 is my 3rd or 4th pair of this same style of platform mary jane sneakers from volatile. i can also wear these to shit, despite the platforms, i’ve worn away the soles on these shoes before. i usually wait till they’re on sale for around $19 to scoop up a replacement. these ones have lasted a few years, though. i’ve stopped making them my EVERY DAY SHOES. i have a bad habit of doing that. pair #10, i’m not even gonna front. hot topic, yo. invader zim topsiders. or whatever you wanna call them. they’re so awesome they don’t even need a reason to exist. i got them last year, or the year before i think. they rock!
flats & such total: 10
this is a quick group that i couldn’t squeeze into another shot. honestly, you’d think i’d have more sandals but the downside of living in new england (of which there are many, MANY downsides) is the weather/environment is usually pure shit and thus you want to be covered up most of the time. or to avoid the grossness on the street/floor/etc. bummer.
ok, now on with the quick and dirty rundown:
- sandals bought at the flea market in puerto vallarta, 2009: they’re fucking adorable, also, MEXICO!
- sketchers sandals from famous footwear bought in 2009 for our mexico trip: comfy as hell
- probably from payless or something, bought in 2009(?) most likely for the express purpose of showing off my snazzy foot tattoo (back when i only had one!)
- ditto these ones, payless or target. unsubstantial, but they get the job done!
sandals total: 4
ok, this should be a pretty easy group to run-down. and honestly, i wasn’t sure if i was going to even count them, but anyway… #1, my nike flip flops from famous footwear. mainly used for beach, gym, to & from showers and the like. they’re worn to shit and won’t be long for this world, but are stil useable in most respects. purchased because despite being as unsubstantial as flip flops, they’re really comfortable. pair #2 is my current set of nick & nora slippers from target. they are the fucking best! sock monkeys, comfy as shit, awesome! of course, both the eyes fell off of the left slipper, but i don’t care. i love these things. i have probably blown through more nick & nora slippers than i can count. which is why pair #3 is the as yet unopened replacement set of slippers for #2. i’ve taken to buying them 2 at a time these days. especially since my favorite sock monkey styles sell out mega super ultra fast. damn. which explains pair #4 which is the previous style that sold out. unfortunately, they’re a little large, so they don’t stay on well. these are actually the replacements for the original pair in the same style. seriously, i destroy slippers! pair #5 is the replacement adidas sandals that took over for my nikes. i got these at famous footwear as well. in better weather, they take me to and from the gym. also they’re cushy as hell. i love them. pair #6 is my most shameful pair…COMPLETELY UTILITARIAN AND NOTHING ELSE! since the weather turned to absolute shit this winter, pair #5 no longer worked to get me to and from the gym, and sometimes i don’t have the locker space/time to deal with my timberlands for the quick jaunt down the street. thus: the world’s most ugliest shoes! thankfully these are NOT uggs, i got them for a motherfucking fraction of a fraction of the price of uggs at payless. plus they’re airwalks, and i have a soft spot for airwalks. surprisingly comfy, but hideous as hell. only for the gym. seriously.
comfies & slippers total: 6
and lastly, there’s a pair of flip flops in the trunk of my car for beach emergencies (or whatever)
there is also this one, cute, sparkly pair at work under my desk for if i get too warm in my rain boots. they are also from payless, i got them during my december chicago trip right before the holiday party, before i found the kenneth coles. no time to return them, but they were uber-cheap and are cute so, score!
and last but not least, this pair which should have arrived at the post office today…
are those not the most delicious shoes ever? i’ve certainly come a long way from my payless days…
- running total of all my fucking awesome shoes
- boots total: 10
- fancy heels total: 7
- awesome heels total: 9
- flats & such total: 10
- sandals total: 4
- comfies & slippers total: 6
- extra shoes not in group shots: 3
anyway, that brings the grand total to…forty-nine pairs of shoes
OMG SHOES!
now i can’t wait for the weather to get less grotty, slushy and gross so i can bust out some of my more awesome pairs (trick: they’re ALL awesome)!
